Lovin' On Some Precious Bunnies

Man I wanna rabbit so freaking bad!  

Can you feed veggies covered in cheese fondue to rabbits?  I have dreams of having a tea and fondue party with my rabbit.

Are rabbits allergic to chocolate like dogs are?

If I had a bunny I could pretend it was Easter every day!  I'm gonna have a rabbit, and I'm gonna name him Chub Chub... or Pancake... or Bazzle... or Renegade... maybe I need to see my rabbit before I name him...  Should I get a bunny with floppy ears, or one with erect ears?

   

Eventually, I really want a Flemish Giant Rabbit.  

Look at that big furry baby!!!  What a super fatty awesome bunny!  Apparently this type of bunny acts more like a laid-back dog than a bunny, which is the kind of temperament I'm looking for.  I've heard some rabbits are really mean, no matter how much you train them.  I love bunnies, but if my bunny was really mean and wouldn't behave even after I worked with him a whole whole lot, I'd probably just cook him and eat him without much remorse.  I hear rabbit tastes really good.

Check out this video Daniel found in response to my post on hydraulics:

This video is amazing for several reasons. 1) The gummy bear is in undies only, and if that doesn't feel naughty enough for you, 2) He keeps touching himself in kindof an awkward Michael Jackson impression dance move and, 3) At 1:00 he starts shaking his donk all over Youtube quite seductively!  Look at how round and bouncy his booty is, I thought gummy bears had more reserve!

The embedded video is the Hungarian version.  I think not being able to understand any of it, really adds to the charm.

P.S. *GASP*  If I had a yellow duck too, I think that would really help enrich my live Easter "nativity" scene.  :D

Sooooooo…. It’s freaking FIESTA WEEK!!!!

Aiiiiiiiii-Yiiiiii-Yiiiiii!!! Cheech and Chong and Fiesta puppies!

Once upon a time there was a girl who ate way way too much oatmeal. (It wasn’t real oatmeal but a gluten-free version of oatmeal made from buckwheat which tastes pretty much the same.) She put strawberry jelly in it and made swirls with her spoon like how she does when she goes to Cracker Barrel. And even though it made her tummy very very full to eat that much oatmeal, she didn’t regret eating it because oatmeal is oh so very delicious!

I used to want to write stories that didn’t have any real plot or conflict. The story would basically be a description of this impossibly happy situation that someone was in. I think people would go for that. I’d be inventing my own genre because my stories wouldn’t really be funny or dramatic, they’d just be pleasant.

I also want to make my own super super positive tv show, it would be like Mr. Rogers' Neighboorhood, but for adults. There would be a segment with puppets, and a segment where a professional hoola hooper would teach a Mr. Rogers lookalike to hoola hoop, and then we'd watch the Mr. Rogers impersonator feed his fish and listen to him sing songs about how we're special and no one can do a better job of being us than us.

I think I’m going to start up my own consulting business as a phrenologist. I could determine people’s aptitudes for different things, and I want to testify in court and give my analysis of whether the defendant is guilty or not based on their inherent tendency to murder (which I would decipher from the size and placement of the bumps and depressions in their skull).

Resolution to the Poop Volume Question

So I thought about it and also talked to Daniel who pretty much knows everything that’s important to know, about the whole ‘Where does my food go exactly’ question I asked in my last post.   Independently I had decided that mass to energy conversions don’t happen in your body, and that’s not why the volume of food-stuff decreases as it moves through you, but that food mass, like glucose or other sugars, is converted into other substances that you release, via cellular respiration, without you really realizing that you’re releasing them.  Look at this equation:

 

We take in sugar and oxygen and produce water and carbon dioxide.  Carbon dioxide we breathe out and water we can sweat or pee or also breathe out.  So la-tee-da, there you have it.  Obviously this doesn't give the whole story, because we don't just eat glucose, we eat complex carbs and protein and fat, but I think it's the same sort of idea.  Except when you burn proteins and fats you produce some other metabolites like urea and ketones.  However just to be sure, I asked Daniel if mass to energy conversions do actually happen in your body and he said “YES!”  Apparently whenever you’re breaking down something chemically and releasing energy, the sum of the masses of the broken down parts will be less than the mass of the whole of the thing you started with.  I’m pretty sure I learned that in some class at some point but in application, I guess it didn’t stick.

 

By the way, it seems like biology teachers, or at least all the ones that I know about, introduce the whole cellular respiration thing as, “this is how your body gets energy!”   I think it’s a lot more interesting to introduce it this way, e.g. “Have ya’ll ever noticed that the volume of stuff that you eat is much larger than the volume of stuff you poop out?  Why is that?”  That seems like a much more likely thing to wonder about than, where your body’s energy comes from. 

Science is the best tool I know of for making sense of things, especially biology since that’s what most of my questions are related to, and I think it’s important to convey that idea to students – that you can get a lot of your questions ANSWERED!!! if you just learn a little science! 

 

So far 25% of my posts have involved poop in some way.

I don’t understand what this product is for:

I don’t know what body hair you can bleach and it will fix the issue.
Just because it’s blonde doesn’t mean it’s invisible!  

Exhibit A: Hulk Hogan’s ‘stache;  

 

Exhibit B: my legs after not shaving for…  I don’t know … at least a week.   The hair looks kindof like this girl's, all shiny in the sun.

Apparently most women use cream bleach to bleach their mustaches.  I actually kindof wish I could grow one, but not a measely dirt smudge, I'd want a substantial nose neighbor.  How cool would that be?  :D  If I had a mustache, I would want to find other people with mustaches, so we could rub our mustaches together.  

When I poop, am I pooping the same volume of stuff that I put into my mouth?  It sure doesn’t seem like it.  I feel like I eat A LOT!  But then every morning after the bunghole train has left the station, I examine my handiwork and I’m just not convinced!  I mean, I know we break down food for energy, but what does that really even mean?  (I realize I’m about to have a biology degree in a year, and I should be the one answering this question, but I’m confused) Is there really a conversion of mass to energy in my body???  I don’t think that’s what happens – I think the chemical bonds in your food are broken and that’s what gives energy, but the mass should still be there!  Right?

 

I think many people get married to escape loneliness and maybe people truly feel like they’ve escaped it when they first get married, so they think they’ve succeeded.  But really, it’s always going to be you inside your own head, with no one ever understanding exactly what you’re experiencing or thinking.   

My hair smells like illicit substances from Marley Fest...

First Taste

I think I'm going to build a labyrinth with rocks.

Labyrinths are neat.

I think I’m going to start a competition with myself every year – like a personal challenge.  For instance, I want to try to eat 1000 tacos in a year.  Except I don’t know as I want to do that one first, as I didn’t come up with it – I read about someone else doing that.  I would like to do something similar. 

I want to take a year off after college.  I don't know what I'll do.  Maybe just eat tacos. 

This blog is really going downhill fast...

I don’t know if I’ve ever written about this before, but when I was really little I used to think that butts were where poop was stored, and really big butts just hold WAY more poop than most people’s butts.  And in this context, I wondered why people thought butts were attractive.

I’m not a cannibal, but I’ve certainly considered it.  Is it possible to make human caviar?

I am so sick of big dog snobbery.  Little dogs get so much crap for being little, and many times they can be more pleasant than big dogs.  Have you ever met a Havanese?  Those dogs are the friendliest, best behaved little dogs, and they hardly ever bark.  I agree that greasy little terriers and ratty little poodles can be intolerable little shitbricks, but big dogs can be pretty obnoxious also.  Some chows and labs bark constantly, and pit bulls maul children for crying out loud!  Anyway, both big dogs and little dogs can be menaces so why the prejudices?

NOTE: The artwork in this post is original BTW.

Better Than Fine

When I grow up I want to have a cupcake stand like the one downtown.  Hey cupcake!

I’m soooooo freaking pumped about Easter!

Man, I really wish I could do voodoo, and could make magical magnets to bring certain people or animals to me when I wanted to see them or pet them or talk to them.  I would have a magnet specially made for cats since cats never want to be my friend.  Except for David’s cat – but I think that cat’s just using me as a rubbing post for his ears. He probably doesn’t actually care about my friendship.

Why have I never dated a black guy?

Damn!  I think I've discovered something more amazing than the second coming of Jesus, viz. hydraulics. 

Seriously I'm obsessed.  How do they make those cars bounce and dance like that?!  I made this dank ass cumpilation ;) video, as a tribute to my favorite souped up lowriders hittin' the switches. 

I think I'm gonna need some help hooking up my Avalon...  volunteers?

A Price Too High For Riches

I've read that babies have x-ray vision, which is why they laugh all the time.  It's probably true.

You know what I just realized?  How totally fascinating my belly button is.  It’s amazing!!!! There’s 5 pointed star at the very center of my belly button.  I think most people fail to appreciate their buttons.  I have observed that people who are more overweight, tend to have longer tunnels.  I like my umbillicus a LOT!

Retardation: A Celebration

When I die, I really want people to lie about me in my obituary, because that’s exactly the kind of thing no one would suspect!

 

AUSTIN - University of Texas student, Lauren King fell asleep in the arms of Jesus on Friday.  A hell-raising alcoholic and polyglot, she spoke five languages and could cuss in two more, all the while slurring every word.  All smiles and hair and charm, she made several appearances as one of Barker’s Beauties on The Price is Right.  Though born to be a lover not a fighter, she regularly engaged in gun fights with IRS auditors and vampire cops under the banner of liberty.  King was frequently hostess to many flamboyant, yet classy, gorilla orgies, citing their need to express their authentic sexuality in a place where they would not be judged.  A friend and advocate to man and beast alike, she will be sorely missed.

 

Old Habits, New Beginnings

Soooooo....  I made this blog a while back and then just NEVER wrote in it, but I think I'm gonna start.   

I’m probably not going to write much about the normal day-to-day things that happen to me because I think that kind of stuff is boring.   I’m going to write about the things I think about, and crazy ideas I have.  I have a lot of ideas for this blog actually…  

Am I a natural blonde as my blog name suggests?  I can’t decide.  Naturally my hair is an ashy light brown in the shade and a golden-y dark blonde in the sunlight, so who can really say.  I highlight a lot of it.  I’m definitely light complected though with blonde eyelashes and eyebrows, so I think the name works.