Come on bartender, be a little more tender. I ate all your peanuts, return me to sender.

Tomorrow Ian's going out on his second date with some new girl off OkCupid.

We've been broken up for 10 days.

I could have dates too by now!  I could be on a date tonight if I felt like it!  I get like 20 messages a day (well, if it's going well) on OkCupid.  In fact, now, I feel compelled to go on a date.
I don't want to though.  Ugghhhh I just dooooooonnnnnn't feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel like it.  How can I go out on dates when I feel so depressed and messed up inside?  How does HE do it?  :'-(
Second date, that's like the first kiss date ...  Ugh!  The thought of that makes me want to barf.  Some other girl gets to kiss him when I don't get to.  It tears me up inside.  Ian says stupid things like, "You're making a bigger deal out of this than it is."  It is a big deal to meeeee!

Oh well, he groped my breasts like a 14 year old anyway.